Mi Hamba Blog

Okay, not everyone’s life sucks.  But if you’re reading this because the title caught your attention, then chances are you’re not happy with your life.  Why aren’t you happy?  Because deep down, you know you’re meant to be living a different life and you’re just not doing it.  This brings up 2 questions:
 - Why aren’t you living a better life
 - What can you do about it

Let’s address the first one - Why aren’t you living a better life?  This could be because you’re spending so much time pleasing others that you have no time left to take care of you.  Family to take care of, spouses to keep happy, friends to be a sounding board for, jobs that pay the bills but don’t fulfill you.  Where in all of this are You?  Where are you taking care of your wants and wishes.  If you sacrifice yourself for others, you’re doing them a disservice, but more importantly, you’re losing yourself in the bargain.

What do you really want?  What makes you happy when you think about it?  What dreams have you left behind in the name of “responsibility” and “sacrifice”.  If this is you, that feeling of “there must be something better” is your intuition telling you that you’ve got another life you should be living.  Likely you’re comparing your life to another vision of what you want.   That’s what creates the contrast and the feeling that your life sucks.

So what can you do about it?  If you have a vision or an idea of what your life should look like, begin to explore it.  You’ll find that when you have a vision of what you want, and begin to work towards it, you have renewed energy and happiness.  This is fueled by a sense of purpose.  Do you remember that feeling?  That’s what life is meant to be like. 

Follow your dreams.  No one else can do that for you.  Do you think it’s out of reach?  It’s not. If you don’t know where to start, consider life coaching.  It will help you focus on what you want for your life and give you the tools you need to be successful.

Remember, you are an extraordinary You. 

The key slips effortlessly into the ignition, you turn it clockwise and the engine roars to life, the little dashboard lights come on, as they are suppose to and everything looks fine. You release the brake, shift into reverse and notice the brake light is still on. You reach down and pull the lever to be sure it is disengaged…lights still on, “wonderful”. You turn the key counterclockwise and the engine stops…wait a few seconds and bring it back to life…lights still on.

OK, not a big deal, but now you notice another light…little round circle with the letters ABS inside…what the heck is this? Turn the engine off again..on again..of again…on again..stupid lights are still on.

Truck is running, gas gauge is registering, RPM dial seems to be working, oil pressure up, battery gauge, arrow in the middle…we’re off, what could possibly be wrong?

Maybe there is a short and the lights are stuck on..could we be that lucky?

Three miles down the road..AARRKKK..another light comes on..this one makes you realize there is definitely a problem somewhere…CHECK ENGINE..not a good sign.

A mile from home you look down to see how fast you are going and notice that the speedometer isn’t registering anything, but, of course this is not a major catastrophe, since you never really look at that thing anyway.

Made it home, slip into the drive and shut of the offending lights. Grab the owners manual and start wildly thumbing through the pages…the answer must be in here somewhere.

After twenty minutes of trying to make sense of this easy to understand book, you come to the conclusion that the anti-locking brake system (probably something to do with the hydraulics), is causing the brake light and ABS light to stay on and the CHECK ENGINE light being on, means the whole thing is ready to blow, or who the heck knows what’s wrong.

Does this scenario remind you of anything else?

Is your life running a little sluggishly? Maybe you haven’t had a reality check in a while, and it’s time to think about where you are going and is this the direction you envisioned when you set that goal. Are you making progress towards the goal or dream, or are your warning gauges about to come on and bring you to a screeching halt?

There is no owner/operator manual you can grab to find the answers, but life coaching can help you get the sludge out of your life, turn the warning gauges off and show you how to make progress towards that goal and dream.

When will you be happy?  When you get that brand new car you have been working towards, or maybe when you move into your new home, or how about when you finally fall in love with your perfect soulmate?

Sometimes we can get so caught up in visualizing our goals that we think we cannot be happy until we achieve them.  Once we achieve the first goal, we still are not happy because we now have our sights set on the next one.  We then end up in a state of always chasing our happiness.  The problem with this, is that it puts the vibration out to the universe that we don’t have what it takes to be happy now.  The law of attraction of course responds with giving us more of not having what it takes to be happy now. 

Happiness is a feeling and is therefore a choice.  It doesn’t matter what is going on in your life  right now, you get to decide if you are going to be happy or not.  Andy Andrews in his book The Traveler’s Gift puts it this way, “I do not sing because I am happy, I am happy because I sing.” 

 If you need help to put you in a happy state, do whatever it takes.  You can sing a song, go outside and enjoy the beautiful abundance of nature, or play with your children or your dog.  Take some time to look around you and see how fortunate you are and know that you are a wonderful person who deserves to be happy.  Choose to be happy now.

Using your newly discovered Personal Growth to coach and mentor your children is a bi-product of all the hard work.  The end result of all the work is a realization that just about everything boils down to a series of choices: choices that will have either a positive or negative impact on your goals.  You can choose to share this realization with your children in a way that they understand or allow them to figure it all out on their own.

My 12 year old daughter lives with her Mother a couple of hours away.  There she has her friends, her room, her school, her dance classes, her favorite corner store — her comfort zone.  Here she comes to visit and although there is a fountain of love and admiration for her and many attempts to keep her entertained she is out of her comfort zone.  Now in the eyes of a 12 year old girl, her comfort zone is everything. 

You may recall my comparing your comfort zone to your wealth zone and when you expand your comfort zone your wealth zone expands right along with it — no different for her.  It is just the energy that she uses to measure her wealth that is different.  After some days she starts to miss all of the comfortable and fun things that are in her life back there.

Now dear old Dad and the other important people in his life are starting to feel like there is a lack of love, a lack of desire to be with them and a lack of “comfort” here.  With just a little thought however the realization is just that my beautiful Daughter simply has not been armed with the ability to make choices for herself and about her comfort zone.

Obviously a discussion is in order and it can really go two ways:  I can let her know how dissappointed I am that she would rather be there than here and not try and understand her feelings, or I can talk to her about making some choices.

We talked for about 30 minutes or so, not about how the situation was making me feel but how the situation was making her feel.  I pointed out and helped her do the math on how many summers she would have to spend quality time with both her Mom and her Dad.  She could choose to make the best of both or she could choose to brood over the fact that she was out of her comfort zone — that made sense to her.  We spoke about how she really only spends 15% of her time around her Dad and this part of her family and how she could choose to not enjoy that little time because she misses her Mom and her friends.  That made sense to her.

Now that she is feeling better about her choices her comfort zone is expanding which means she is feeling wealthier.  Amazing how her feelings being more positive are allowing her to think more positive thoughts and how she is taking more positive actions which as a result are producing more positive results for her.  Use the Law of Attraction to help your children — that will make sense to you and to them.

Are you a procrastinator?  I think it is safe to say that we are all guilty of this at one point or another, some of us are definitely worse than others.  It is so much easier to say that you will do something later than to actually get off your behind and get it done now.

In “Success Through a Positive Mental Attitude” (an incredible book by Napoleon Hill and W. Clement Stone) they give us a great suggestion of a self motivator DO IT NOW!  When you have something in mind that you want to accomplish, just do it now.  Don’t wait until later today when you feel up to it, or tomorrow, or the next day, DO IT NOW!  A great way to practice this is to begin with the little things.  You will soon develop a habit of taking immediate action which is a powerful reflex response.

You can also find an accountability partner, a life coach is a great example of this.  If you make a committment to yourself to accomplish something within a week’s time, you are much more likely to get it done if you know you have someone else to answer to.  We tend to hold our committments to others at a higher degree of importance than our committments to ourselves.

When I decided to implement these techniques into my day to day life, I quickly found myself actually getting stuff done, instead of just talking about what I am going to get done.  I would love to hear your comments and suggestions about how you combat procrastination in your life.

I have been a student of Personal Development for A couple of years now and I know that the Law of Attraction works, not just some times but every time. I know it. I have experienced it both good and bad.  The problem that many of us have though is keeping the Law of Attraction working on our behalf in a positive way. 

That statement in itself is a very large part of the problem.  You do not need to try and have the Law of Attraction Working — it just does.

Here is the deal — the law of attraction gets it’s fuel from the vibes you put out in your thoughts.  Remember your feelings determine your thoughts that determine your actions which we all know equates to your results.  So since we cannot control the Law of Attraction, just like we cannot control the Law of Gravity we need to control our thoughts right?  Go ahead give it a try — control your thoughts before they happen.

We all know that you can only have one thought at a time and it is either going to be positive or negative.  We also know that there are way to many thoughts going on to control.  Just like if I said to you, what ever you do — do not think of or picture in your mind a Canadian Flag.  That big red Maple Leaf will be right there staring you down.

Could be looked as another dilemma — one that cannot be overcome.  Can’t control the Law of Attraction because that is controlled by our thoughts which we cannot control. sheeeesh! 

Wait a minute — we can control our feelings can’t we?  We can actually determine what we are feeling, we can change our outlook on whatever it is that is making us feel that way: turn a negative into a positive if you will.  This is a practiced excercise and the best way to learn how to control your feelings so that you are thinking positive thoughts most of the time is to journal on them — write those positive and negative feelings down — get clear on what each feeling is making you think.  Much easier to turn a negative feeling into a positive to raise your vibrational energy to a positive.

As you change your mindset through your feelings, never forget that a positive feeling and thought carries much more impact with the law of Attraction than the negative ones do.

We know that the law of attraction states that we get whatever we put our attention, energy, and focus on, so why doesn’t the $1,000,000. check magically appear regardless of how hard or how long you concentrate on it?  The short answer can be summed up with one word — balance.  You can sit and think and believe that you will receive the money as long as you want, but until you take the action required, it is just wishful thinking. 

Conversely, you can work your tail off doing everything that you know to do to receive your desire, but until you believe, you won’t achieve.  Action and focus work hand in hand, you can’t have one without the other.  You must do your part, and you also must allow the universe to do it’s part.  If you are consistent and persistent in your daily action, and you are clearly focused on what you want, the universe will do the rest. 

 You may not know all the action that will be required to bring you your desire, but all you have to do is take the first step.  The universe will reveal new creative ideas and action steps to you as long as you are consistent with your focus, belief and always taking the next step towards your goal.

Start today by writing out your goal and begin to take the first action step.  Stay focused on that goal and always taking the next step towards it.  Even if you don’t achieve your goal you will notice incredible personal growth in the journey.

I’m not someone who watches a lot of television, mainly because our selection includes garbage, trash and violence.  However, aside from some great television (Discovery Channel,  The Learning Channel and Arts & Entertainment to name a few) there are some programs that I really love.  My favorites are The Next Food Network Star, American Idol, So You Think You Can Dance, and Last Comic Standing.

I like to say I’m not a fan of reality TV, but I’ve named 4 above that draw me back time and again.  Why is it that?  I’ve realized that what these programs have 1 empowering element in common…

Imagine having a dream, a passion, a goal so far out of your reach you think it’s impossible to achieve.  Then along comes someone who will mentor you, take you completely out of your comfort zone in a very supportive environment, and directs you to the tools you need to be successful.  All you have to do is show up and do the work so to speak.  That’s what these programs do for you.  They take the average person, cultivate your dream, support and encourage you while you do things you’ve never done before, as you begin to believe you can achieve anything you set your mind to.  Before you realize it, you’ve achieved your goal.

That’s the value of a mentor or life coach.  What’s your impossible dream?  Who’s your mentor?  What we now know is that anything is possible for anyone.  You bring the desire and the coach will bring the toolbox.

Personal Development — takes practice and experience.  Like most things, as you start to practice a new skill such as guitar, piano, swim or personal growth the “novelty” wears off relatively quickly and it may start to feel like work.  This is all about achieving our results isn’t it?  We must remember that our results will not be determined by what we did yesterday, or even what we are doing right now.  Our results will be determined by our feelings, thoughts and actions from this moment on.  Developing a vision of our burning desire.In every case of our desired achievement, there will be adversity — this is not if there will be but that there will be adversity.  Great victories always come after adversity has been overcome.  Knowing the Law of Attraction we always attract our own adversity and that is a fact.  Once we allow and empower ourselves to overcome what is guaranteed to come we will achieve our vision.  Many times the adversity is the means to the end for the realization of our goals and aspirations.

Regardless of what the adversity is or when it rares it’s ugly presence you must be aware that it is enroute to you.  Through this adversity you will develop a story for yourself and whether you choose the story to be positive and empowering or negative and disabling.  Through working on your own personal growth, now, when things are great or, now, when the adversity is feeling overwhelming.  Belief in yourself is developed through your own mindset and your mindset is not easily developed all by yourself. 

Get good at Personal Development by tapping into associations with successful people.  A life Coach can show you the way, can provide the excercises and the mental visualizations of your burning desires.  You can also find the tools that will allow you to grow and to be able to change the way you look at adversity and at your life situation.  I find it so much easier to have someone that holds me accountable and keeps me in integrity to the promises I make to myself.

There are times in any relationship, that the other person will get on your nerves.  Have you ever experienced this?  There’s someone very close to you - a husband, wife, other family member or friend - and they’ve said something that upsets you, or they behave in a way that you really don’t like.   The problem is, they’re a huge part of your life and you love them - you just don’t like them very much right now.

Here’s a great tip on how to handle these situations.  Make a list of all the things you like about the person.  Are they funny, do they tell great stories, are they great listeners?  How about the times they cheer you up or the great parties they have.  Everyone has great qualities and if they’re in your life, there’s something about them that you can appreciate.

By focusing on all the things you love about the person, you’ll shift from being irritated or upset with them, to being grateful for having them in their life.  Gratitude is the most powerful method of attracting great things into your life.  You may also consider sharing that list with the person in the form of a gratitude card.  It will make both of you feel good and the other person will focus too on all the great things you feel about them.

Knowing that the law of attraction brings to us what we put our focus and energy to, you’ll soon start seeing more of the qualities you love about that person being brought out in your interactions with them.