Mi Hamba Blog

When we say our life isn’t working, what we’re really saying is that there’s something in our lives that isn’t working - another direction we’re drawn to, or elements that hold us back from living our purpose. If you’re feeling this way, question what doesn’t make sense in your life.

In order to make the changes that will make a meaningful difference, we must first understand where we are right now, and how we got there. It’s almost like taking a spectator approach to the movie of our lives, and reporting back on it.

- What’s your life like right now - the good and the bad?
- How does it make you feel?
- What circumstances and choices brought you there?
- How many of the circumstances in your life keep you from feeling good?

This awareness process is so very important in identifying what’s not working for us, what doesn’t make sense. So often we don’t even recognize the subtle things, the habits, the routines that are keeping us stuck and make us feel like life isn’t what it’s supposed to be. By consciously putting our attention on it, in a non-judgmental way, we can begin to change the things, circumstances and habits that block us from living a happy, fulfilling and meaningful life. Isn’t that what we all ultimately want?!

Now that you know what’s been happening, promise yourself that you’ll take some time to listen to what your inner voice is trying to tell you. Journal about your life this next week and identify those things that you can change. You’ll be amazed at what you learn about yourself and how easily what doesn’t make sense, can change.

What can you do to begin to experience more joy in your life right now? To get immediate relief and escape from stresses in your life…to have FUN! I call them the “50 Ways to a Happier You”

Only you know what makes you happy. That unique combination of seeing, experiencing and doing that makes you forget everything else and just be in the moment. You know what I’m talking about, don’t you? Likely, you’ve stopped seeing, experiencing and doing those things that bring you joy. Let’s bring them back now.

Make a list of 50 things that make you happy. They don’t need to cost money, or involve others, or mean that you have to travel to get there - although they can. What’s important is that you list the things, even the seemingly small things, that bring you joy.

Here’s a short list from others who have done this exercise:

- Reading
- Enjoying my coffee on the patio
- Long drives on winding roads
- Fishing with the kids
- Taking the dogs for a walk
- Listening to music
- Bubble baths
- Travelling
- Garage sale shopping
- Painting

If you can’t think of 50 things right now, that’s ok. Keep the list with you and add to it when you recall another thing that brings you joy. In the meantime, do something from the list every day, or at the very least, several times a week.

The more you put yourself in situations that bring you joy, the less that stress takes over. The less stress and more joy, the easier you’ll be able to get in touch with what’s most important to you.

Is true happiness as imaginary to you as Tinkerbell and fairy dust? It doesn’t have to be. Happiness is our natural state of being … one that may have eluded you until now, but no longer.

Who Are You

Do you feel like you don’t know who you are anymore? If so, that could be the reason you’re not experiencing the kind of happiness we’re talking about here. But where do you start?

Life Purpose: We all have one. It’s what defines our role in life and our way of contributing - another factor in happiness. It’s a combination of our passions, talents and character; the calling of our soul. Living life on purpose means we’re in harmony with what’s most important to us. If you don’t know what yours is, begin to explore what matters most to you and what you feel happiest doing. Take time alone to reflect and journal about your insights.

Ok, you get it. But you’re not in touch with your life purpose … yet. For some, uncovering life purpose comes quick and easy…for others, it takes some time. Either way, patience and trust is key in this process. As you gain clarity, life takes on new meaning.

Living a life on purpose not only brings you back to happiness, but it’s the responsible way to live - by example.

Happiness.  What is it? With well being and contentment to be glad, cheerful, lighthearted, joyful, joyous, satisfied.

No matter how you define it, it’s a state of “being” - a way to “feel”.  It’s when those pleasure endorphins race through our bodies creating that euphoric state - our natural state of being.  Why then, do so many of us race through life in pursuit of it…forever searching?

The Eternal Search

Why do so many of us keep searching for happiness and never seem to find it?  Sure, there are those fleeting moments or events that bring us joy, but I’m talking about real happiness; the kind that comes from deep inside - who we are, not what we experience.  That kind of ultimate happiness is right in front of us, waiting to be embraced again.  But alas, we’re blind to it.

No more!  That’s about to change…

Youthful Joy

Do you remember when you were a child, how happiness came so easy, so effortlessly?  In fact, you probably didn’t give the subject of “happiness” much thought at all.  You just were happy.  That kind of youthful joy is what I suggest is our natural state.  It comes from inside us, not any external event or location.  So what happened?

As we grew up, we had “responsibilities” thrust on us and were taught to be “practical” and “sensible” and “cautious” - all those things that old, outdated ways of living will tell us we need to be.  The problem is, we lose who we are in the process - the essence of where our joy comes from.  When we’re slotted into a life that doesn’t fit with who we are, and what we’re meant to be doing in this life (our purpose), happiness seeps out of us like the air out of the tire with a small nail in it.  It’s a slow leak of our life force, justified with the  “that’s just the way life is” attitude.

It’s not - life is meant to be joyous, fun and fulfilling.

Take the time to reconnect with what’s most important to you in life.  Do the thing you enjoy doing.  Experience life with youthful and inquisitive eyes.  Surround yourself with the people and experiences that bring out the best in you.  Bring back that youthful joy of life!

We thought we’d leave you with something to smile about today.  Something to kick off your weekend, bringing some more happiness and joy into your life.

This video was taken at Central Station in Antwerp, Belgium.  The Sound of Music.  Enjoy!

The #1 thing we all want is to be happy.  So why aren’t we?  Invest 3 minutes right now to learn the answer to that question.

Marci’s New York Time’s bestseller, Happy for No Reason: 7 Steps to Being Happy from the Inside Out has just been released in paperback - just yesterday!  If you don’t own your own copy, now is the right time.

Never in our history have so many of us needed to hear this message.

Your life is waiting!

Sometimes you will think that an expected situation is one where you will be able to spend some time on you and maybe even give your loved ones a bit of a break.  However, once you get into that situation you quickly realize that, what was anticipated to be a warm and friendly environment, quickly turns into a negative and scary one.

This is exactly where I found myself over the last couple of weeks.  I had been waiting for a surgery to fix my bad leg, and I had been waiting for a very long time so I was very happy and grateful when the call came and I was scheduled for the operation.  It was finally happening, I was going to be blessed with a healthy leg, body and I would recover very quickly.  My beautiful wife and I would be on the dance floor in no time — CHA, CHA, CHA!!

I was almost looking forward to the short stay in the hospital — 3 days was all.  I packed my bag with all of the neccessities — ipod with audio books, my favorite personal development books, notebook and a couple of pens just in case.  I was full of intention to work on my own personal growth and transform anybody that crossed my path.

I quickly realized that this was a very different world than my own protected little environment that we had created at home.  These were some stressed and negative people and I mean everybody, from my room-mates to the staff that were so stressed because of being so short handed.  I was so grateful for my mindset going in as it empowered me to fall back on all that I have learned with the Law of Attraction and Life Coaching.

My surgeon sat on the side of my bed 2 days after I got there, looked me in the eye and told me that the surgery did not work — he was going to go and re-do it, try and fix it but his words to me were — if it did not work the first time, it probably won’t work the 2nd time.  In my heart and mind, I knew that it would work and never gave up that belief.  I told him — you do the surgery and it will work this time.  It did.

I am so happy and grateful to be back home, in my “comfort zone”, with the people I love and cherish.  My ability to draw upon all that I have learned over the last few years was instrumental to my ability to handle and deal with the last few weeks.  I hope this article may inspire you to ensure that even though you are in your “comfort zone” right now, be prepared for when you have to leave it.  Get yourself armed with the belief structure and mindset that will allow and empower you to do whatever you want — live from the inside out!!

Golf — Now there is a way to spend a couple of hours excercising your ability to pay attention to and control  your feelings.  Especially the ones that produce those nasty limiting beliefs we keep writing about.

I am not a golfer — not by even a stretch of anybody’s imagination.  As a matter of fact I usually call it “Swish — Darn — Drag Your Bag”.  On Sunday however, I was invited for a round of golf by a good friend that I used to work with and had been missing for a while now.  He is a good golfer, retired and when we worked together was really a surrogate Father for me.  You know what I mean I hope, he was someone I could depend on for advice in life situations and he never hesitated to give it — just like Dad.

When we got to the golf course it was really busy and because it was just the 2 of us, we were asked to be accompanied by another couple of people.  Wonderful people and again pretty good golfers.  Enter my first Limiting Feeling of the day:ought:

I can’t golf with these people — I will just delay and hold them up — which I was able to relpace with:

Even though I am unable to golf as well, I am so grateful that they will be able to give me some great tips and that they are so understanding.

What is amazing is that they were very understanding and they did offer some great tips.  As a matter of fact for every ball I hit over the fence they found 2 for me as they assisted me in looking for mine.  That in itself empowered me to develop an allowing statement of:

Many people are hitting golf balls out of bounds, just like me!

I wasn’t the only one hitting them over the fence and out of bounds and I knew it because I had the proof — there were a ton of lost balls in those woods.

As you can imagine, there were a ton and I mean a ton of limiting beliefs and feelings about my golf game as I progressed through the day.  Because of my experience with being a student of personal development, I was able to recognize them and re-phrase them as a positive statement instead of a negative statement.

To the unseasoned person of Personal Development the first 9 holes were disastrous and a non-believer would think — there I told you — that stuff doesn’t work.  The second 9 holes however proved my knowingness that controlling your feelings and your limiting beliefs is absolutely transformational.  All of a sudden I was hitting my drives straight, or at least straighter, I wasn’t losing my ball anymore and I was able to at least keep up.  I actually shaved over 10 strokes from the front nine — now that felt good!

Had I not been able to control my feelings I would have been an emotional wreck by the 6th or 7th hole and not enjoyed a single minute of the game.  The folks I golfed with all mentioned what a great attitude I had about being so bad at the game.  I think that was a compliment.

If you have watched the movie “The Secret” or you are familiar with the law of attraction, then you know that the universe responds to your feelings and gives you more of the same.  This is good news for you, as it is alot easier to control your feelings than it is to control your thoughts. 

It may seem difficult sometimes to have positive feelings when outside circumstances, situations, and even other people around you are not exactly very positive.   You may find yourself saying to a loved one “You make me really angry when you do that”.  The reality is that you alone control your feelings, another person does not make you feel anything.  You decide at every given moment how you are going to feel, inspite of what is going on in your life.

The first step in taking control of your feelings is simply knowing that you have that control, just be conscious of it.  You will then begin to notice the next time you are having negative feelings, and be aware that you need to turn those feelings upside down. 

Removing yourself from the negativity around you is imperative to a positive mental attitude.  If you are unable to physically remove yourself, take a few moments to remove yourself emotionally.  You can use this time to go within, quiet your mind and find your inner peace.  Think of all the positive abundance in your life and how truly blessed you are.  You will soon start to notice the shift in your feelings from negative to positive. 

Okay, not everyone’s life sucks.  But if you’re reading this because the title caught your attention, then chances are you’re not happy with your life.  Why aren’t you happy?  Because deep down, you know you’re meant to be living a different life and you’re just not doing it.  This brings up 2 questions:
 - Why aren’t you living a better life
 - What can you do about it

Let’s address the first one - Why aren’t you living a better life?  This could be because you’re spending so much time pleasing others that you have no time left to take care of you.  Family to take care of, spouses to keep happy, friends to be a sounding board for, jobs that pay the bills but don’t fulfill you.  Where in all of this are You?  Where are you taking care of your wants and wishes.  If you sacrifice yourself for others, you’re doing them a disservice, but more importantly, you’re losing yourself in the bargain.

What do you really want?  What makes you happy when you think about it?  What dreams have you left behind in the name of “responsibility” and “sacrifice”.  If this is you, that feeling of “there must be something better” is your intuition telling you that you’ve got another life you should be living.  Likely you’re comparing your life to another vision of what you want.   That’s what creates the contrast and the feeling that your life sucks.

So what can you do about it?  If you have a vision or an idea of what your life should look like, begin to explore it.  You’ll find that when you have a vision of what you want, and begin to work towards it, you have renewed energy and happiness.  This is fueled by a sense of purpose.  Do you remember that feeling?  That’s what life is meant to be like. 

Follow your dreams.  No one else can do that for you.  Do you think it’s out of reach?  It’s not. If you don’t know where to start, consider life coaching.  It will help you focus on what you want for your life and give you the tools you need to be successful.

Remember, you are an extraordinary You.