Mi Hamba Blog

Do you ever wonder why the Law of Attraction doesn’t work for you?  I know in the past that I certainly have.  Why do I get more bills when I want wealth?  Why do I encounter unhappy and angry people all the time?  Why do others get to travel to the exotic and exciting places I want to go.

It wasn’t until I understood that the Law of Attraction was working in my life (albeit in a negative way) that everything started to change for me.  You see, it was what I was focusing on that got me more of what I was focusing on.  Kind of a catch 22 scenario.  I focused on more bills, so got more bills - car broke down unexpectedly, kids needed to borrow money, Christmas snuck up on us again.   You know the story.

My life coach pointed out to me that as long as I focus on what I don’t want, I’ll always continue to get more of it.  She suggested to put my focus on what I want.  Very soon, coincidences weren’t coincidences - they were the Law of Attraction bringing those things that I wanted into my awareness.  These opportunities changed everything.  Let me give you a couple of examples:

I focused on financial abundance and within a week we received a $657.00 check in the mail from our mortgage company, refunding an overpayment of our prior year’s property taxes.  We also unexpectedly received a $5.41 check from our cellular service company from a class action suit we knew nothing about.  A small amount, but financial abundance nevertheless.  We received a $300 credit on our credit card for purchase bonuses for that year.

I focused on rebuilding a healthy lifestyle.  One of the things that I love to do is go for walks in the woods connected to our property.  I won’t do this by myself and I didn’t have a partner everyday.  The very next day, an old walking partner from over a decade ago approached me at a coffee shop.  It seems she had just moved into the area we now live and would love to start walking together again!  I also saw the very next day that our local gym is now offering step aerobics classes which I absolutely enjoy.

On list of 100 places to see, Italy was very near the top. On an upcoming conference that I already knew I was attending, the announcement was made that it would be held in Rome, Italy!  Yes, we travelled to Rome and saw almost all the places that we wanted to see.  Now I know we will return to Italy and spend some more time experiencing the places we didn’t manage to pack into that amazing vacation.

It’s just like when you’re thinking of buying a new car or truck.  All of the sudden you see that car/truck on the road in exactly the color you want.  It’s not that there are more of that car/truck on the road, you’re just now aware of them.  Focusing on what you want brings the people, places and things you want into your awareness.

Make a commitment to yourself to start putting your focus and energy on those things you truly want!
 

 Just like the age old discussion of which came first the chicken or the egg, there has been a similar discussion about thoughts and feelings.  Many believe that your thoughts come first and determine your feelings, while many others believe that you can first decide how you are going to feel and then let your thoughts come from your feelings.  Where do you stand on this?

According to the movie “The Secret” you have over 60,000 thoughts in a single day.  How could you ever possibly hope to have control over that many thoughts?  Even if you made the conscious effort to control a fraction of these thoughts, how do you turn those thoughts into feelings?  You would be extremely susceptible to your other uncontrolled thoughts to take over your feelings at any given moment.

In my opinion the only way you can use the law of attraction to bring you what you want, is to start with your feelings.  Your feelings are so much easier to be conscious of and therefore to control.  If you decide you want to be happy, you get to just be happy.  You can then bring happy thoughts into your mind to support this feeling.

Many great arguments have been made for both sides of this discussion.  I would love to hear some of your opinions.  Feel free to share your comments with us.

How do you live your life?  Do outside circumstances determine how you feel inside?  It is so easy to get caught up in reaction mode.  You simply respond to every negative or positive person or situation with an equally negative or positve feeling.  By doing this on a consistent basis, you are giving up control over your feelings and therefore your life.  It doesn’t have to be that way. 

You can decide to live life from the inside out.  The way you feel each and every minute is up to you.  Let’s explore this further with an example.

If you are driving down the road and another driver cuts you off, you have two choices.  You can decide to get angry and express your anger with some colorful words and a flip of your finger.  This option will in turn cause you to possibly drive more aggressively yourself and therefore become a danger to yourself and others on the road.  The second option you have is to respond with a feeling of gratitude.  Yes, you got cut off, but you are so fortunate that the other driver did not hit you.  

Remember the law of attraction brings back to you whatever you give your attention, energy and focus to whether positive or negative.  By being in control of your feelings, you are enabling yourself to live a more positive life.

Do you really know what you want?  This may sound like a stupid question, but let’s explore it for a minute. 

Take one of your goals and ask yourself why you really want to achieve it.  When armed with your answer, ask yourself again why that is importatnt to you.  If you continue this process you will eventually get to your core values and reasons for wanting what you want.  Your final answer will most likely be a feeling that you will receive once you achieve that goal.

The question then becomes “What can I do right now that will enable me to feel that same positive feeling?”  One of two things can happen when you allow yourself to feel these feelings now.  Either the law of attraction will guide you towards the achievement of your goal by bringing you more of the same feeling, or you may discover you don’t need to achieve that goal because you are perfectly happy now.

This is an important exercise to take with each one of your goals.  Not only does it confirm what you really want, but it uses the law of attraction to help you achieve it.  Upon repeated practice, this self discovery process will allow you to know what your core beliefs and values are, and help you to live a purpose driven life.

What are your limiting beliefs telling you?  What are your goals and aspirations today, in comparison to 5, 10 or even 20 or more years ago?  Your belief system is the foundation of your achievement levels and as we all know you cannot build a strong building without a good strong foundation.

Today as I walked through a grocery store I was fortunate enough to run into some Clergy that reminded me of my childhood.  I was raised in a very spiritual and religious family, which I am eternally grateful for.  I was able to witness my parents and their circle of influence do great things for so many people in need.  It was also, however, from this very up bringing that I developed my limiting beliefs such as:

You only need enough to survive

Money is the root of all evil

Any more than survival and comfort is a waste

and so on and so on!!

Many times when I wanted something extravagent or outside of our normal day to day existence, my Dad, in his own way, would teach me that you should not want to have more than you absolutely need by saying — Just a second and I will go out to the shed and open another barrel of money.  Now I am not even remotely suggesting that I blame my parents or my up bringing for my inherent issue of just surviving — I just realize where I learnt it and now I know how to address it.

For that I thank myself.  I am so grateful that I realized that I must become a student of personal development and most importantly the principles that make up the Law of Attraction.  It is because of my studies with this law that I now realize that my survival is not the important thing.  The important thing is that I become affluent enough to help as many people as possibe and the only way to do that is to change my limiting belief from survival to affluence.  I know now that I do not want to be wealthy, I owe it to society to be wealthy because as I simply survive I cannot build a hospital wing or feed a family, other than my own and that is just not good enough.

When will you be happy?  When you get that brand new car you have been working towards, or maybe when you move into your new home, or how about when you finally fall in love with your perfect soulmate?

Sometimes we can get so caught up in visualizing our goals that we think we cannot be happy until we achieve them.  Once we achieve the first goal, we still are not happy because we now have our sights set on the next one.  We then end up in a state of always chasing our happiness.  The problem with this, is that it puts the vibration out to the universe that we don’t have what it takes to be happy now.  The law of attraction of course responds with giving us more of not having what it takes to be happy now. 

Happiness is a feeling and is therefore a choice.  It doesn’t matter what is going on in your life  right now, you get to decide if you are going to be happy or not.  Andy Andrews in his book The Traveler’s Gift puts it this way, “I do not sing because I am happy, I am happy because I sing.” 

 If you need help to put you in a happy state, do whatever it takes.  You can sing a song, go outside and enjoy the beautiful abundance of nature, or play with your children or your dog.  Take some time to look around you and see how fortunate you are and know that you are a wonderful person who deserves to be happy.  Choose to be happy now.

Using your newly discovered Personal Growth to coach and mentor your children is a bi-product of all the hard work.  The end result of all the work is a realization that just about everything boils down to a series of choices: choices that will have either a positive or negative impact on your goals.  You can choose to share this realization with your children in a way that they understand or allow them to figure it all out on their own.

My 12 year old daughter lives with her Mother a couple of hours away.  There she has her friends, her room, her school, her dance classes, her favorite corner store — her comfort zone.  Here she comes to visit and although there is a fountain of love and admiration for her and many attempts to keep her entertained she is out of her comfort zone.  Now in the eyes of a 12 year old girl, her comfort zone is everything. 

You may recall my comparing your comfort zone to your wealth zone and when you expand your comfort zone your wealth zone expands right along with it — no different for her.  It is just the energy that she uses to measure her wealth that is different.  After some days she starts to miss all of the comfortable and fun things that are in her life back there.

Now dear old Dad and the other important people in his life are starting to feel like there is a lack of love, a lack of desire to be with them and a lack of “comfort” here.  With just a little thought however the realization is just that my beautiful Daughter simply has not been armed with the ability to make choices for herself and about her comfort zone.

Obviously a discussion is in order and it can really go two ways:  I can let her know how dissappointed I am that she would rather be there than here and not try and understand her feelings, or I can talk to her about making some choices.

We talked for about 30 minutes or so, not about how the situation was making me feel but how the situation was making her feel.  I pointed out and helped her do the math on how many summers she would have to spend quality time with both her Mom and her Dad.  She could choose to make the best of both or she could choose to brood over the fact that she was out of her comfort zone — that made sense to her.  We spoke about how she really only spends 15% of her time around her Dad and this part of her family and how she could choose to not enjoy that little time because she misses her Mom and her friends.  That made sense to her.

Now that she is feeling better about her choices her comfort zone is expanding which means she is feeling wealthier.  Amazing how her feelings being more positive are allowing her to think more positive thoughts and how she is taking more positive actions which as a result are producing more positive results for her.  Use the Law of Attraction to help your children — that will make sense to you and to them.

I have been a student of Personal Development for A couple of years now and I know that the Law of Attraction works, not just some times but every time. I know it. I have experienced it both good and bad.  The problem that many of us have though is keeping the Law of Attraction working on our behalf in a positive way. 

That statement in itself is a very large part of the problem.  You do not need to try and have the Law of Attraction Working — it just does.

Here is the deal — the law of attraction gets it’s fuel from the vibes you put out in your thoughts.  Remember your feelings determine your thoughts that determine your actions which we all know equates to your results.  So since we cannot control the Law of Attraction, just like we cannot control the Law of Gravity we need to control our thoughts right?  Go ahead give it a try — control your thoughts before they happen.

We all know that you can only have one thought at a time and it is either going to be positive or negative.  We also know that there are way to many thoughts going on to control.  Just like if I said to you, what ever you do — do not think of or picture in your mind a Canadian Flag.  That big red Maple Leaf will be right there staring you down.

Could be looked as another dilemma — one that cannot be overcome.  Can’t control the Law of Attraction because that is controlled by our thoughts which we cannot control. sheeeesh! 

Wait a minute — we can control our feelings can’t we?  We can actually determine what we are feeling, we can change our outlook on whatever it is that is making us feel that way: turn a negative into a positive if you will.  This is a practiced excercise and the best way to learn how to control your feelings so that you are thinking positive thoughts most of the time is to journal on them — write those positive and negative feelings down — get clear on what each feeling is making you think.  Much easier to turn a negative feeling into a positive to raise your vibrational energy to a positive.

As you change your mindset through your feelings, never forget that a positive feeling and thought carries much more impact with the law of Attraction than the negative ones do.

We know that the law of attraction states that we get whatever we put our attention, energy, and focus on, so why doesn’t the $1,000,000. check magically appear regardless of how hard or how long you concentrate on it?  The short answer can be summed up with one word — balance.  You can sit and think and believe that you will receive the money as long as you want, but until you take the action required, it is just wishful thinking. 

Conversely, you can work your tail off doing everything that you know to do to receive your desire, but until you believe, you won’t achieve.  Action and focus work hand in hand, you can’t have one without the other.  You must do your part, and you also must allow the universe to do it’s part.  If you are consistent and persistent in your daily action, and you are clearly focused on what you want, the universe will do the rest. 

 You may not know all the action that will be required to bring you your desire, but all you have to do is take the first step.  The universe will reveal new creative ideas and action steps to you as long as you are consistent with your focus, belief and always taking the next step towards your goal.

Start today by writing out your goal and begin to take the first action step.  Stay focused on that goal and always taking the next step towards it.  Even if you don’t achieve your goal you will notice incredible personal growth in the journey.

How do you start each day?  Do you simply just roll yourself out of bed, or does your day start on purpose and on track with the achievement of your goals?  The following are a few examples of simple mental exercises that you can use to kick start each and every day and begin to live a purpose filled life.

Laughter has a great effect on things such as stress management, increased pain tolerance and immune system.  It also helps to get you in a positive vibration for the day if, within moments of awakening, you laugh for several seconds.

Visualizing your goals each morning at the start of your day helps to get your creativity juices flowing with ideas of ways for you to achieve those goals.

Affirmations can help you bridge the gap between the person you are being now, and the person that you want to become.  They are a great tool for building your belief and self image.

Going through your gratitude list each morning puts the law of attraction to work in your favor for the rest of the day.  By focusing on the things that you are grateful for in your life, you will notice more things to be grateful for.

Journaling is a great tool to use to manifest the day you intend to have.  In addition to writing in your journal at the end of the day about what happened that day, you can write in your journal in the morning about what you are going to make happen in your day.

These are just a few tools which I have implemented in my morning routine.  The great thing about them is they don’t have to take any extra time out of your day.  You can visualize while in the shower, or go through your gratitude list while brushing your teeth.  Start with just one of them and then begin to bring more of them into your routine.  I look forward to hearing the feedback on your positive results.